This or that is the quickest couples game there is. There's no setup and no wrong answer, and each pick takes a second. The reasons behind it can take all night: why the window seat, why tacos, why lights off.
We wrote every pair on this page. The Bedroom set is suggestive, never graphic, and it's meant for couples who are already close. Playing alone tonight? Ask one of our girls. She'll pick, tell you why, and ask you one back.
How to play this or that as a couple
- 1Pick a setDates, Romance, Lifestyle, Food and travel, Fun or Bedroom. Or keep All for a mix.
- 2Count to threeRead the pair out loud, count to three, and both say your pick at once. No changing answers.
- 3Defend itPicked differently? Each of you gets one sentence to win the other over.
- 4Keep score, or don'tCount how many you matched, or skip the score and talk about the surprises.
This or that for couples: four ways to play
The count-to-three version is the classic. Once you've played a round, try a twist.
- Guess first. Before your partner answers, guess their pick. A point for every right guess.
- Speed round. Ten pairs in one minute, no explaining allowed. Then go back to the one that surprised you most.
- Over text. Send a pair and agree to reply at the same moment, so nobody copies.
- Plan with it. Play the Dates set on Thursday, then do whatever you both picked on Saturday.
Spicy this or that questions
The Bedroom set is for later in the evening: big spoon or little spoon, lights on or off, pajamas or nothing at all. It's flirty and suggestive, never explicit, which makes it an easy way to say what you like without a big talk.
A few rules keep it fun. Either of you can skip any pair. A pick is a preference, not a promise. And if an answer surprises you, be curious, not shocked. When two options aren't enough, our dirty questions ask the follow-ups.
What your answers say about you as a couple
Matching answers feel good, but the mismatches are where the game gets interesting. "Save it or spend it?" is a money talk in disguise. "Plan the week or wing it?" tells you how your next trip will go. "Text or call?" might explain last Tuesday.
It's not a compatibility test, and nobody should break up over cats and dogs. Treat each difference as a question: why that pick, since when, and what would change your mind. For questions that go deeper, try our questions for couples.
Play this or that with an AI girlfriend
Press Ask under any pair and pick a girl. Her chat opens with "This or that:" and the pair typed in, and nothing is sent until you press send. She picks one, tells you why in character, and usually sends one back. A bratty girl might argue with your pick; a romantic one probably goes for the candlelight.
Every character is a fictional adult, and the game can go on in her chat as long as you like. Want a different game? Try never have I ever.
Updated October 2026